The more I climbed in the world’s eyes
The more my soul appeared to die…
At the pinnacle of success I was perched high
Yet part of me longed to bid goodbye
To this peak below which shaky was the ground
Ambivalent I felt about wearing the crown
The top, you know, is a place best defined
By never-ending stress on the mind…
I reached this height serendipitously
The ascent too occurred precipitously
Leaving me without any time to acclimatize
I had become a celebrity long before I realized..
My story is Cinderella-esque, yet I complain
For fairy tales their fair share of woes contain
What began as an afternoon project one day
To flex my creative muscles in an unusual way
Over the next few months, became an obsession
I rushed home from work to “work” on my creations
Showcased them in a local exhibition at a friend’s request
Where, in a dream-come-true fashion, they piqued the interest
Of an entrepreneur, leading promptly to a collaboration
That became wildly successful, beyond imagination..
As business grew, multiple responsibilities I assumed
Worked hard to keep up with demands, as business bloomed
Of course I was happy my work had received such admiration
Yet stress coursed through my veins more often than exhilaration..
As my brand became international, busier I grew
Travel, TED talks, events were thrown into the milieu
I still had signature designs, but assisting me
Were other talented designers working for my company
My brand value climbed, my satisfaction plummeted
Despite tasting success, sometimes I regretted
That initial exposure that had catapulted me
Into the realm of business from my shell of creativity
I had soared higher, above my friends, leaving me
Excluded from their sphere, and lonely
The high that I used to get after a creative endeavor
Ebbed away- to the whims of the market I had to now cater
As a young female entrepreneur, I gained acclaim
Yet I did not gain happiness along with fame
Deeply depressed, seeing therapists, taking medications
Trying mindfulness, tai-chi, yoga, meditation-
One day I felt I could not take it any longer
Call me weak, but accepting defeat made me feel stronger
Before the inevitable decline began, I had decided to quit
In the world of business, I had never quite fit
So I sold my company and took a break extended
The broken parts of my soul I mended
My creative energy I now spend
On my own terms, I no longer bend
To the pressures of the market, my wares I sell
In local stores, supporting small businesses as well
The brand I created is still profitable
But removed from it, I am more comfortable
At the end of the day an artist am I-
Business definitely is not where my talents lie
I realized this in time, before depression
Could cause irrevocable harm to my person.
4 thoughts on “I quit”
The poem reflects my innerself!
Wow. Could so relate to this poem. Am sure it would have been difficult to put it out there but am so glad you did. I feel your inner turmoils. Success demands your soul for sure. I am so glad you were true to yourself. 🙂 Happy for you:)
I went through something similar. I wrote about it here- not as elaborate as you did, but this itself was so difficult. : https://ashwinis-perceptions.blogspot.com/2018/05/looking-back-atoz-challenge-reflections.html
Do consider a blog-hop like ‘A2Z’. I have a feeling your writing will be a hit. 🙂
Your poem about your MIL on Women’s Web brought me to your blog. That was awesome as well.4
I also enjoy expressing my thoughts in the form of poetry:
Do visit my blog and share your thoughts.
Thank you so much for your encouraging comments.
I love your blog- trying to read through as many of your posts as possible.
As a disclaimer, these poems are usually not about me. I never had a business, and this blog is the only creative outlet I have. I was actually thinking of Kate Spade but I never end my poems negatively.
Similarly, the mother-in-law poem is also fictional…
Oh. Felt so real. Superb imagination. Like I mentioned when I shared the MIL poem, it broke the stereotype that women don’t love their in-laws and the taboos around adoption.
Thanks for visiting my blog. 🙂