Permission

Why do I feel the need to seek permission

As if alone I cannot make the decision

To curl up in bed, leave chores incomplete

Sleep with abandon, no deadlines meet

At work, at home, children’s assignments from school

Maybe for a day, forget all the rules..

But the idea of loosening up is scary to me

What if my carefully constructed life goes awry

Our collective sanity depends, I believe

On my meticulous planning, if I leave

Anything to chance, disaster would unfold

My family would be subjected to miseries untold..

Thus taking time out for myself does appear

An unnecessary, selfish indulgence, I fear

So even when no one imposes demands on me

I carry the burden of keeping my home orderly

And look for permission from…I realized just now

The never-ending list of tasks- that list never allows

Me to take time off, pencil in “vacation” days

Therefore my life goes on in the same busy way…

**

So here’s my new resolution for me

I’ll give myself permission to be tardy

Leave tasks until later, rest when I feel the need

I don’t need to ask anyone else indeed!