Grudge

That thing I hold inside of me

Against a (?real) (?imaginary) adversary

The thing that my mind cannot process

Festers like a putrefying abscess

Or like a low grade tumor that continues

To enlarge, a wound that continues to ooze

Spreading evil humors throughout me

Threatening my peace of mind, my sanity

The resentment that has become embedded in to

My corpuscles, my marrow, my veins it courses through

I cannot purge myself clean unless I tear apart

My very being, my body, mind and heart

*

That grudge, that anger, that resentment

Misplaced, misdirected, harmful in intent

Aimed at someone else but with direction reversed

To devastate me, to keep me in discomfort immersed..

As I approached the breaking point, not knowing what to do

One day I just let it go, without even thinking it through

Like a discarded cloak, I just threw my grudge away

My spiritual healing began that day

I forgave the one against who all these years

I had held a grudge, out of irrational fear

Of getting hurt myself if I did forgive

Clearly with a misconception I did live..