Self-worth

Peace and tranquility are hard to find

I’d gone to great lengths to quieten my mind

Tried everything the world tells one to do

Forced myself into various practices too

That have been proven to infuse calmness

But underlying issues I did not address

For my simmering discontent, that feeling pervasive

Of never being enough, with which I had habituated myself to live..

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Anything I encountered in my daily life would

Trigger feelings of inadequacy, I stood

On a shaky ground where my self-worth was tied

To what I achieved, therefore no matter how hard I tried

To improve my self-worth, it did not do so

No achievement was enough, I kept feeling low

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That feeling of never being enough colored everything for me

In increasingly grayer shades of despondency

Never was I with my situation at ease

Therefore never was I able to find peace

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It took years of self-examination to identify

What was wrong, and I still wonder why

I decided my self-worth equated what I achieved

This erroneous connection I had to cleave

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I wish I could say that I’ve found the solution I need

That from the shackles of my thinking I’ve been freed

It is a work in progress, and not a straightforward one

To accept myself as I am is easier said than done

One thing is clear- mental peace shall elusive stay

Until I accept myself independent of my achievements one day