
You can never become indifferent
You can never become immune
When your patient despite your efforts loses their life
It affects you profoundly, it cuts like a knife
You retrace your steps, you wonder if there was something you could have done
That you did not do, something that would have changed the outcome
You mourn the loss, you feel defeated
Your reserve of stoicism has been depleted..
*
Death is an integral part of practicing medicine
Each death feels like a loss, each life saved a win
But death keeps us grounded, while saving lives
Gives us the motivation to try our best, sustains our drive
*
The finality of death makes it a bitter pill to swallow
But in despair I cannot continue to wallow
I reflect in gratitude on the time I had spent
In caring for my very sick patient
I achieve closure and am able to continue
To care for my other patients too

A lot of obits, especially for cancer patients, always thank the doctor for all their care. I hope the doctors see that and know they did good. It’s got to be hard, though.
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It is always hard! Thank you for your kind words.
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