Passion…unbridled

Some days I feel like I am floundering helplessly

Like a fish that has been taken out of the sea

Through life’s turbulent motions, I cannot seem to find

A firm footing for my discombobulated mind

I struggle and writhe until I realize

The futility of my enterprise-

Then I sit back and let life take its course

I resign myself to a more powerful force

*

Then there are days when I seem to rise and shine

My confidence is high, everything falls in line

For me to cruise smoothly through the day

I encounter no roadblocks along the way

I am grateful for days that proceed such

There is nothing else that I need much…

*

There are days of victory and days of defeat-

Days where I feel like I have two left feet

In the grand scheme of things, the two

Are almost equally spread out too

I celebrate the wins, (hopefully) learn from bad days

And try to feel productive both ways!

You should strive to be the best version of yourself, you are told

But how do you envision that version, how do you let it unfold

You can only be a better version of yourself than you were yesterday

But what would the best version of you look like, how do you say?

*

How can you define the version of yourself that is best

If you are on a never-ending quest

To improve- each version of you is better than before

If you achieved your best version, you would not improve anymore..

*

Wherever you start from, just try to ensure

You are moving forward from where you were before

The best possible version of you would be

The one that is honest and full of authenticity

I read stories of different kinds

One interesting theme that comes to my mind

Involves two protagonists living in eras different

Usually one living in a past century and one in the present

Similar in gender, age and their struggles as well

Both with similar yet different stories to tell..

*

Two parallel stories, shifting from one to the next

Keeping the reader engaged by varying the context

It is a clever technique of writing, and I often find

With one of the two characters, my interest is more aligned

I love climaxes where the two stories intersect

And the past and the present are tied in a manner perfect..

*

Giving free rein to my imagination, perhaps I could

Conjure up my alter ego who would

Hypothetically live in a bygone century

But in temperament and spirit would be similar to me

I could try to imagine her struggles parallel to mine

But obviously different, set in a different time…

I think it would be an intriguing exercise

During the process, I would prepare myself to be surprised..

This poem is inspired by a poll of “things the pandemic ruined”..

When you think about it, it is a shame

Post-pandemic, things are just not the same..

*

Supply-demand mismatch, shortages rampant

Prices soaring to a stratospheric extent

Irrevocable differences among family and friends

Over vaccines and masking, arguments that never end..

Burnt-out health care workers, whose exit from the workforce

Has left a large void, difficult to fill, of course

*

All of us seem to have taken a blow

To our mental health, the strain does show

We are more anxious and irritable now

Than we were in the pre-pandemic era somehow

The initial days of isolation and quarantine

Are over, but some strange times we have seen

Having gone through periods of fear and uncertainty

We now have a heightened sense of anxiety

*

COVID remains a poignant reminder in my mind

Of the worst times that we have now left behind

If you place me in a room with even a single book in sight

I know curiosity I would be unable to fight

I would open the book and try to read

If I can, if it is in a recognizable script indeed

Otherwise I would marvel at the print and illustrations

You see, I have a compulsive inclination

Towards books of all genres, preferably in a language I know

But even if I do not understand the language I cannot let go

Of a book before me without examining it in some detail

In piquing my interest, books never seem to fail..

*

The printed word holds an unparalleled charm for me

I am thankful that books are available readily

I understand it is a privilege to have countless books to read

There are children across the world, deprived of books they need…

*

If I could teach impressionable minds

To discover companionship in books, I would find

A purpose in life that is closely aligned

With my identity that as a reader I’ve designed

In practicing medicine, doing a little more than a little less

Intuitively appears to be the right thing to do, a slight excess

In terms of treatment in order to alleviate

Patients’ suffering seems better than to leave them in an uncomfortable state..

There is no reason to wait and watch, and risk deterioration

When multiple interventions can be performed for symptom amelioration..

*

Interventions are advised with good intentions

But what is increasingly coming to attention

Is that there is over-treatment in contemporary healthcare

Increasing downstream costs and complications of which we should be aware

Antibiotic resistance, drug interactions

Radiation from imaging, adverse drug reactions

Are “side-effects” of overprescribing and over-treatment

More treatment is better only to a limited extent..

*

Not every ailment needs treatment aggressive

Sometimes time and rest is what we need to give

To our patients, we should not forget

That the body can recuperate, rejuvenate and reset..

Buddha is quoted to have preached this in his prime-

The trouble is that you think you have time..

*

So I find myself in a quandary here

If I heed the message in this quote I fear

Feeling even more rushed than I do

I already feel pressurized by passing years to

Accomplish my goals fast, before age-related decline in my faculties

Catches up with me, leading to difficulties

In achieving the modest goals I have set

For myself- I do not want to leave the world with regrets..

*

The quote may not refer to achievement of goals, on second thought

If I acknowledge I may not have much time,

I should not

Follow the wrong path, stay angry or hold grudges in my heart

I may not have an opportunity to right all my wrongs before I depart

From this earth- this must be what Buddha wanted to convey

The quote makes more sense when I think about it this way..

*

Time passes by relentlessly

How I use my time on earth is up to me

One thing is increasingly common these days

We feel a sense of urgency in different ways

When a text message or an e-mail is received

Somehow, subconsciously our minds perceive

It as important, we interrupt our work readily

And proceed to read and respond to it urgently

Every meeting is crucial, every project has a deadline

Everything in life appears urgent by design

Life is so fast-paced that we are on constant run

Trying to reach the finish line as soon as we’ve begun

How to prioritize becomes a dilemma existential

In the level of urgency between two tasks, there is no difference substantial

*

The tyranny of the urgent is a modern day curse

Making us feel inadequate, making our lives feel worse

Most tasks are not urgent, most messages can wait

We need not resign ourselves to this “urgency state”

When things feel urgent, a deep breath we should take

Reorganize our list of things to do, prioritize for sanity’s sake

*

It would be good to remember that in reality

Things are not as urgent as they seem to be

Therefore to perform tasks with urgency there is no need

We must work at a more relaxed pace indeed

I used to travel to see

World-famous sites, to be

Able to declare I had been

To a popular place, that I had seen

Natural wonders and renowned monuments

To “see” more of the world was the intent

Behind travel-that is what I thought

But of late, traveling more extensively has brought

A different perspective on travel for me

I no longer travel to “see” a place exclusively

*

Let me elaborate- the best part of travel lies

Not in places, but its people, I’ve realized

That the stories the local people have to tell

Are the ones I want to listen to as well

I want to hear their history from their perspectives

I want to know how their lives have been lived

Through struggles and revolutions about which I might have read

In filtered and censored versions, I get to learn instead

How the common people view their governments and nations

What they take pride in, and what frustrates them is usually a revelation

*

To experience breathtaking sights is an exciting part of the travel process

But to know a personal story from the place of travel, in my opinion, is priceless

How did we think we could outpace

Nature and no consequences face

We assumed everything in nature was free

For our consumption, all the bounty

Of the earth for us to plunder, pick and choose

What we needed, that we might one day stand to lose

Did not occur to us as we burnt down forests, and emitted

Greenhouse gases, destroyed natural resources in places we inhabited..

*

If we look at ancient cultures we find

The natural elements they were inclined

To treat with reverence, they were attuned

To the flora and fauna around them, they did not just assume

That they could take anything that they desired

They consumed the natural resources they required

The balance

*

Humankind has plundered resources the earth for centuries for its greed

Now that we are facing the consequences we need

To re-examine the wisdom of the ancient civilizations

Maybe we can learn a thing or two about conservation..

When presented with a brief interlude

During my day, I prefer to spend some moments in solitude

To reconnect with my feelings, examine with a critical eye

If anything is bothering me at that time and why

If I feel at peace with myself, I try to find

The factors that have brought a sense of calm to my mind

This is an effective and efficient way

To check-in with myself every day

To take stock of my emotions and regulate

To the best of my ability, my emotional state

*

By being attuned to my emotions, knowing why I feel a certain way

Has helped me in more ways that I can say

When I realize I am overwhelmed, I know

To take a deep breath and go a bit slow

Just acknowledging that I am bothered helps me

To get over my annoyance and move on with placidity

And when I feel perfectly content, I say a short prayer

Because such moments are as precious as they are rare

Not long ago, the norm for most adults used to be

To have a full-time job to pay bills, and a hobby

That was intended for relaxation, on which time would be spent

As and when available, but to a limited extent

*

But this is the era of the gig economy

These days you have a side gig, not just a hobby

That you can on social media publicize

And if you are diligent about it, it can be monetized

So many people have been able to turn

Their erstwhile hobbies into sources of income

You do what you love, and film it simultaneously

To generate content for the world to see

Getting paid for it seems just an icing on the cake

You are thrilled by the money you can make..

*

Except- the side gig that was supposed to be

An upgraded version of a relaxing hobby

Now turns into an unhealthy preoccupation

With gaining followers and content creation

You try to create new stuff to keep engagement high

But your new content is from your old hobby a far cry

Maybe your 9 to 5 job you have quit by now

To free up more time, in order to allow

You to focus all your energy on your online presence

And now the pressure to generate content is intense..

*

Eventually you decide the influencer life is not for you

Pay your bills with a job and relax with a hobby is what you should do…