Passion…unbridled

I always thought life-changing moments would

Announce themselves with a bang as they should

They would propel me higher or deliver a blow

But the impact would be powerful enough for everyone to know..

*

The older I get, the more I realize

Life-changing moments tend to take me by surprise

Catching up to me stealthily from behind

Audible as a whisper but resonant in my mind

A seismic change I feel in my bones

But that change is noticed by me alone..

*

I had romanticized the idea that landmark events

Would shape my destiny, unprecedented opportunities present

To take a giant leap of faith, I would experience transformation profound

I would accomplish improbable feats with energy newfound

But momentous moments have had little impact

On deciding the course of my life, in fact

An epiphany has changed life in an instant

When changing something was not my intent..

*

When life brings about change, I surrender and embrace

The change that may take me to a better place

A thousand odd pieces of my heart

Poured on paper, each poem a part

Of my soul, my being, my existence

A reflection of my life’s experience

Emotions from a snapshot in time preserved

My poems have over the years served

To memorialize my thoughts most ardent

To be a medium through which I comment

On happenings in the world, large and small

Burning issues that have moved me are all

Reflected in my poems, when I re-read

Each poem, I go into an introspective mode indeed

I rediscover and relive the experiences of my past

Through my poems, I hope my fervor to write lasts

Until I do, I hope there always would be

A way for me to express myself poetically..

I am bothered by this increasing pervasive narrative

That we are being poisoned by the environment in which we live

Plastics, microplastics, heavy metals, endocrine disrupters are everywhere

We must be extremely cautious and aware

Of the toxins around us that are making us sick

Only organic, purified, cruelty-free and natural ingredients we should pick

If we do that, our chronic conditions would disappear

If we do not, progressively worsening health we should fear

**

There is substantial merit in this advice

But all “pure” things come at a steep price

The contaminated or toxic stuff is ubiquitous

Easier to obtain and use without fuss

While specialty stores carry the organic stuff

To buy it at stratospheric prices is tough

When you cannot obtain products that are toxin-free

You feel incompetent in taking care of your health, you feel guilty

**

Feeling incompetent is counterproductive

Being guilt-ridden is not a good way to live

My philosophy is to reduce toxins in ways that feel right

But not go to such extremes that every day seems like a fight

To avoid exposure to every single toxin around

Base decisions on commonsense and scientific research sound

Most of the time I am like an open book

My emotions are reflected in how I look

I share too much, wear my heart on my sleeve

I call a spade a spade, and tell people what I believe

The consequences are not always pleasant

I spill too many secrets in the heat of the moment..

*

When I get hurt, to myself I vow

That spilling my guts out I would not allow

My very loquacious tongue to do

My resolve is good for a day or two

Until I find a friendly, attentive ear

And I completely disregard my fear

I share things about me that portray me

In a rather poor light, unfortunately

*

I know I increase my vulnerability

By sharing my life and my thoughts excessively

In a world where our lives are on constant display

I have to be more discerning in what I say

But when I try to develop an aura of mystery around me

I come across as aloof, reserved or even unfriendly..

*

If I could come across as honest and considerate

Without divulging my secrets, that would be for me an achievement great

I read that our planet is literally getting cooked

Climate change has never as bleak looked

As it does now, the temperatures soaring in the stratosphere

Heat waves, wildfires, hurricanes to stay are here..

Last year broke records in terms of heat

This year temperatures are poised to beat

Those from 2023, what else is there is store

The impossibly high numbers barely register any more

We just watch weather patterns go haywire

There are floods and there are wildfires

There are heat waves the likes of which used to be

Unfamiliar to those in temperate climate territory

But temperate seems tropical, tropical climate like the desert in mid-day

For temperatures to become reasonable I pray..

*

When budding architects future buildings design

The rising temperatures they would need to keep in mind

The answer to global warming does not lie

In staying indoors and cranking the air conditioning high

Our finite resources are being sacrificed

At the altar of climate change, but they do not suffice

Climate change is here to test the limits of human ingenuity

But we shall stay afloat in the rising levels of the sea..

I look at my child wistfully, wishing that he

Would be interested in or excel at a particular activity

Like every parent, I want him to have a future bright

I want him to do everything considered “right”

And then I remind myself- he is his own person indeed

To expect something from him is a reflection of my need

To realize my unfulfilled dreams, which I am trying to do vicariously

The trouble, then, does not lie in what he is doing but squarely with me…

*

It is hard to know in parenting where to draw the line

Encouraging and guiding children is fine

But when our aspirations we inadvertently place

On our children, the consequences they have to face

Each time I try to force my son into something, I look within

To uncover if I am trying to live my dreams through him..

*

My child is under no obligation

To lead my dreams to actualization

Let him chase his desires, and let me

Extend my support unconditionally

Each time I sit down and drift

Into a daydream, I feel a shift

In my perception when I come back

To the real world, I notice I lack

The otherwise omnipresent sense of urgency

I feel I’ve developed complacency

Though the feeling is transient, and soon I find

Productivity anxiety creeping up in my mind

*

When I daydream, time seems to dilate

I want to stay in that trance-like state

For a little longer, daydreaming helps me slow down

Just enough to relax me all around

*

In the course of a busy and intense day

I need an escape- daydreaming provides me a way

Of temporarily leaving the real world behind

And that does wonders for my hyper-charged mind

(And many thanks to those who give feedback!)

It would be nice if I could express myself well

If my story in a more compelling manner I could tell

But I fumble for words, and cannot quite get

The right expression for the desired effect

What I say does not come across the way I intend

Later I ruminate over better ways to send

My thoughts out in the world for others to know

What I want, I wish my words could accurately show..

*

I am trying to gain insight that I lack

By looking actively for feedback

I know for criticism I should be prepared

Even if it is hurtful I should not be scared

I cannot improve in a vacuum I’m aware

I shall learn more if more I share..

I’ve seen people in powerful positions occupy

As much space in a room as they can, they try

To make their presence felt in such a way

That others retreat and don’t have much left to say

*

At the other extreme I seem to lie

To occupy as little space as I can, I try

I want to be known through my work, not my appearance

It does not matter to me whether people notice my presence

*

But I feel discouraged when my work unnoticed goes

I don’t take up much space, so no one knows

Who I am or what I do, I blend in the background

Words compared to actions make a louder sound

*

I realize in societal norms this is rooted

Women not taking up much space is suited

To patriarchal agenda- most men do not find

Taking up more space to be an issue, it’s their right in their minds

*

In this competitive world if I wish to thrive

To make my presence known I need to strive

And take up more space than I now do

I shall place myself front and center too

I leave work on time for once, I am ecstatic

I’ve worked all day with the single-minded focus of a fanatic

I am looking forward to spending a few hours at leisure

Read or watch something for my pleasure

I want to make the most of my evening today

Getting work done early is rare for me anyway

*

I try to settle down with a book and find

I’ve left work physically but my mind

Has not- the events of the day

Heavily on my mind continue to weigh

I’m still wrapped up in my patients’ ailments

Much to my own mental health’s detriment

I dealt with life and death at work, and now

I am unable to break away somehow..

*

I coax myself to shift my gears and pay attention

To the book before me, it is my intention

To completely immerse myself in the book

But I keep interrupting my reading to go back and look

At work-related content on my device

That I do not enjoy my evening should come as no surprise..

*

The inability to break free from work mentally

Has been taking a huge toll on me

This is where I sorely need

To treat work as work indeed

And forget about it when I walk in the door

Of my home, not obsess over it anymore

How did we get to the point where we

Struggle so hard to get healthy?

*

We forgot we were meant to sleep at night

Now research shows our ancestors were right

The brain gets rid of waste during sleep

And that is how our mental faculties we keep

*

We seem to have forgotten how to cook well

To eat fast and processed foods we feel compelled

How did we come to assume that artificial “low calorie” stuff

Was better for us, that real food was not good enough?

*

We devised lifestyles where movement was least required

And after obtaining luxuries desired

We realized we were not getting enough exercise

We started searching for ways to prioritize

Exercise that used to be built into our days

To move more, we try to come up with creative ways

*

Sometimes I wish we would just go back a century

And learn how life in those days used to be

If we were to observe people in that era with an open mind

Invaluable clues to maintaining our health we could find

With the wisdom of old times and advancements in medical knowledge new

We can achieve optimal health too

It is hard to change but there is one trait

That I would really like to cultivate-

Patience unfortunately is not a virtue I possess

And impatience often comes in the way of success

With any endeavor in which I get involved

With a little patience, more problems in my life would be solved..

*

When you are always on the go

You want to control the flow

Of events in your life, impatient you become

When at your desired speed things don’t get done

Impatience leads to anger and dissatisfaction

And worsens with everyone else your interaction

That does not help speed things, and you

Become increasingly frustrated too

*

I hope with more patience I would not get frustrated as fast

One needs to wait for good things that last

I must give up the need for constant control

And go with the flow, let things at their own pace roll

*

I am being impatient now, a deep breath I should take

And calm myself down for my own sake

Each time I realize my impatience I resolve

To slow down, let problems at their pace to be solved