Why we don’t talk

This is an intensely personal poem. We are a physician couple and often our entire workdays are spent talking to patients and colleagues (and documenting those conversations). Often in the evening we have no desire to talk at all because we have exhausted our bandwidth for conversation at work. Actually the idea came after I read comments from several people on a physician group that suggested the same.

I just got home, now I should be present

For my child, ask him how his day was spent

I should also talk to my spouse as I get

Dinner ready, but I completely forget

To interact with both of them, as I go about

Chores at home, I am quite content without

Needing to open my mouth to speak

My ability to communicate that was at its peak

During work hours has now sharply declined

In peaceful solitude, my business I want to mind

My husband and I exchange notes, and say

To each other that we’ve had an exhausting day

Being physicians, talking to patients without a break

Has taken away the urge to talk just for its sake

Our preteen is more than happy to not communicate

In anything but monosyllabic replies in his current state

Dinner is a quiet and quick affair to be completed

Efficiently (wordlessly) so the daily cycle can be repeated

Post-dinner with devices or books we unwind

In companionable silence we relax our minds

Difficult conversations that I’ve had with patients, I try to forget

If I talk to my family, I would talk about them and regret

Recreating a situation that was stressful for me

I avoid this by avoiding conversation completely

My husband echoes similar sentiments, therefore

On weeknights we hardly talk to each other anymore…

Published by iheart11

A 30-something year old woman, physician by profession, fiercely passionate about work, family, travel and fashion..

2 thoughts on “Why we don’t talk

  1. I can relate to this in a different manner. My husband retired about 5 years before I did. He was home with the cats all day. I was at work, talking up a storm with coworkers or on the phone. I came home and wanted quiet; he wanted conversation.
    People who say they don’t bring their work home with them are wrong. It always comes home with us in ways we don’t quite see. Good post!


    1. Thank you! Both my husband and I are worse about communicating when we have spent entire days in clinic where there is more talking to do- there are a lot of difficult conversations that are both physically and mentally draining.

      Liked by 1 person

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