Passion…unbridled

It has been found that for a given position women don’t apply

Until they are certain they are one hundred percent qualified

Or even overqualified, while men don’t harbor similar reservations

They are known to apply if they have two-thirds of the qualification

That the job demands, confident in their ability

To learn new skills, while women seem to doubt their capabilities..

This under-confidence tends to undermine

The careers of women from the time

They enter the job market, many women do not achieve

Their full potentials because they continue to believe

That they have to have all the answers and make no mistakes

Growth involves risk that many women are reluctant to take..

*

The societal structure is still heavily skewed

Towards men in business, women are viewed As less capable of being leaders, by both men and women indeed

More women to break these stereotypes we need

Let women be comfortable enough to display

Their ambitions, their visions, and make their way

Up the workplace ladder just like men do

With the right mindset, women can reach the glass ceiling too

In a consumerist society, conspicuous consumption

Comes naturally to us, the assumption

Is that access to a wide variety of goods is an indication

Of abundance and economic prosperity in the population

We consume, and help the economy thrive

The desire for consumption gives us the drive

To work harder, earn more, and invariably stay

On the hedonic treadmill day after day..

*

For a while I have been trying to consume less

Possessing shiny new things does not give me happiness

But from habitual consumption it is hard to break free

One way to get around it is to indulge my creativity

The more I create, the less attractive consumption appears

Create more and consume less is the mantra to which I now try to adhere

*

The antidote to mindless consumption is creativity

When your mind is occupied in creating, you do not see

The bright beautiful objects designed to catch your eye

The less you notice, the less you are tempted to buy

Each time I turn on the radio or television to check out news

There is doom and gloom, I can only choose

Between negative news stories and chronicles of tragedies profound

There are crises and disasters unfolding all around

Senseless violence, extreme weather patterns, unpredictable floods and fires

The toll on lives and property rising higher and higher

The world has always been a chaotic place

But these days with calamities we cannot keep pace..

*

Many avenues for blame, few solutions in sight

At the end of an infinite tunnel I see no light

I worry about the legacy we would leave

For our children, I would like to believe

That our progeny would enjoy the same stability

That my generation did until recently..

*

Right now, a dark news cloud is weighing heavily on me

And I cannot help but think pessimistically

Maybe tomorrow shall bring hope and ideas new

Maybe a silver lining shall peek through

A relentless focus on productivity keeps me wired

Rest does not refresh me, I’m always tired

Rest is something that needs to be earned

This is the unspoken lesson I’ve learnt

It is woven into the fabric of my existence

Such that rest causes feelings of guilt intense

*

I must be productive throughout the day

Engaged in worthwhile pursuits I must stay

Before I can retire to my inviting bed

And fall asleep, after few pages of a book I have read

If I have wasted precious hours doing nothing much

I cannot sleep out of guilt, the pull of productivity is such..

*

It is high time for me to unlearn

The fallacious assumption that rest must be earned

To know when to rest, and how much, I should pay heed

To cues from my mind and body indeed

If I need to rest, I must simply go ahead

And rest well until I feel refreshed

I was told to fit into a box but within its confines I could not stay

I stretched and strained until the walls gave way

I thought I would exit the box and break free

But in a plot twist of sorts, that was not meant to be

*

One foot came out, and my hopes soared high

I thought I could free myself and aim for the sky

But the rest of me remained stuck inside

No matter how many times I tried

*

In a strange state of limbo I did remain

All my efforts to break free went in vain

At the same time inside the box I could no longer fully fit

So I worked without engagement, I had quietly quit

*

Eventually one day another wall I managed to break

From that point onwards, decisions were easy to make

The time had come to sever ties once and for all

Into the old box I resolved I would never fall

Sometimes the best therapy for my anxious mind

Is to read a work of fiction- often I find

That in the lives of the characters I get immersed

And my problems recede in to the corners of the universe

In the manufactured dilemmas of my protagonists I get involved

Instead of my own, their predicaments I want to solve

I turn pages compulsively, curious to know where the story leads

I lose myself completely in the books that I read

*

Some people meditate when they are perturbed, I read

Reading for me has a meditative quality indeed

Reading empties my mind of thoughts that are intrusive

My attention is focused on the book in a manner exclusive

Many times with the characters I relate

And my emotional angst further abates

*

In fact being without a book gives me

A sense of discomfort, a low-grade anxiety

That I have access to a book or two, I always ensure

So that being alone with my thoughts I don’t have to endure

Although I like stories of all kinds

The ones that most engrossing I find

Are intergenerational family sagas that span decades

In which richly textured plots have been laid

On a backdrop of historical events

That are to each generation relevant

Epic tales that delve into the trials and tribulations

Of one family through various generations

Turn out to be incredibly satisfying reads

When I am uninspired, books in this genre I need

*

When I read such books, the authors I admire

For conducting the exhaustive research that is required

To ensure accuracy of historical details-

History is an integral part of these tales

My knowledge of history of various nations, I confess

Has been derived from such books, more or less

*

In the lives of complex characters, myself I immerse

I lose myself in the richly imagined universe

Created by the author, and read

A family saga in a single stretch indeed

It takes tremendous willpower not to react

Emotionally to provocative words, but when I manage to do that

Words lose their power over me, I realize

Each time it still takes me by surprise

*

Words are often used cleverly to evoke

Strong reactions, superlatives can provoke

The best of us to anger or indignation

And that only worsens our own situation

*

As a woman, an emotional reaction hurts even more

Yet another win it allows men to score

Especially in professional circles, where women must appear

To be in control at all times, or being labeled as “angry” fear

*

I am learning to sit back and be objective

Ammunition to others I don’t want to give

By letting their words have power over me

I am trying to stay as composed as I can be

Many of us are conditioned to view the world through a lens of fear

We meet people with caution, the world to us treacherous appears

We are molded by trauma from experiences past

Some our own, and some that have managed to last

For generations, through complex transmission

We navigate relationships on a backdrop of our inhibitions…

*

What if we could replace fear with curiosity?

Approach people with genuine interest, and see

Where we are led, and what we find

Substitute trust for fear in our minds?

It takes courage to let go of fear deeply ingrained

There is a risk of self-inflicting emotional pain

But the reward of establishing a connection deep

With someone we fear is gratifying to reap..

*

Let me be curious, interested, not afraid

There are many lasting connections to be made

There are so many lofty projects in my mind

That I want to complete, but I do not find

The time or energy in my day

Therefore my goals idle dreams stay..

Once in a while I gather motivation

In such rare moments, in a burst of inspiration

I start out with gusto, chalk out a plan detailed

But by the next day I have invariably failed

To sustain my enthusiasm, I have moved on to address

More immediate, worldly concerns, I confess

*

They say that in order to create a habit that can be sustained

You need twenty-one days, but I rarely remain

Committed to my projects beyond a week or two

Making it to the third week is something I rarely do

*

Once in a blue moon I am able to keep

My promise to myself, it requires effort steep

But I find time and show up day after day

Despite various challenges, committed I stay

Unfortunately such occurrences are incredibly rare

I give up all too often, I’m painfully aware..

*

Rome was not built in a day, nor can I complete

My projects in a day, I need to be consistent and repeat

Whatever I have committed to day after day, or week after week

Maybe then I shall find the sense of accomplishment I so badly seek

Overthinking speeds up and morphs into rumination

Leading to near complete annihilation

Of my peace, until there is no where to go

When I hit a wall, I finally begin to go slow

*

I get stressed out until I am as taut

As a spring waiting to snap, I cannot

Deal with another stressor, and that is when I start to retreat

Into a state of calm, I cool down from the intense heat

*

I know I must take action before

My stress levels start to soar

I must try to calm down, maybe meditate

So that I never get to dire straits..

*

But invariably, stressors come from each side

And I cannot stem the tide

Until I cannot take it any more

That’s when I throw my worries out of the door

*

Once the level of stress declines

And I am back to feeling fine

I am able to solve problems one by one

Gradually seemingly impossible tasks get done…

These days when I try to type up my thoughts

I get prompted by AI more often than not..

*

AI is always trying to guess the next word for me

Sometimes it is right and it makes my work easy

By sparing me the effort of spelling the word right

But at other times irritation I have to fight..

I don’t want someone to take over my voice

I don’t want to select from a choice

Of words “curated” for me

It is an affront to my authenticity

*

The solution stares at me in plain sight-

With a pen, on paper, I need to write

Where no annoying prompts or suggestions are seen

My writing can be as authentic as it has ever been

*

Though the world kneels at the altar of AI

Let me chart my old-fashioned path under the sky