Ambition and satisfaction

DSC05944This is a constant conundrum that I face

Trying to find a comfortable place

Where ambition and satisfaction collide

In parallel lines I see them ride

Focus on one, and that picks up speed

Until the other is instigated by need

Then this one speeds up for a while

Trying to cover that extra mile..

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I’m kept on my toes by ambition

It is what gives me some direction

Leads to sleepless nights, that’s true

As stresses of expectation I accrue..

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And when my jar is filled to brim

When the lights of joy appear dim

I resolve to put aside my ambition

And be content with my condition.

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I tell myself I am satisfied

I will be happy where I am, I decide

For a while I feel carefree

Like a weight was lifted off me.

**

Then rises the restless demon

Demanding I resurrect my ambition

Bored with “satisfaction”, I tend to comply

Ambition spurs me to action, I can’t deny.

**

This is the vicious cycle in which I am caught

Satisfaction and ambition, meet they do  not..

I cannot choose one over the other

I shuffle between them, like a fickle lover.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Rushed

snake riverHaphazardly I wandered through life, feeling rushed

Under the weight of time, constantly crushed

Life gushed past me like a mountain brook

Contrary to the way things should’ve been in my book-

My idyllic life would move like a river in the plain

Meandering slowly around bends, then speeding again

But a time crunch I felt nearly constantly

Sapping my vigor, sucking the enthusiasm out of me

For all my ambitions, time seemed to fall short

Many brilliant projects I was forced to abort

I felt I was trapped in an infinite race

Motionless I would stand, and still lose my place

**

One day the realization dawned on me

I’d rushed all my life, quite fruitlessly

Accumulating nothing along the way except stress

And disappointments in this whole process

Simultaneously, though, I did realize

A solution for this problem I had to devise-

I made deliberate attempts to slow myself down

Be mindful of each moment, not let myself drown

In the chaos of random synaptic connections

I let go my glorified ideas of perfection

**

I slowed down and noticed the world pass by

Savoring most moments, not letting them fly

The river of my life was no longer a brook-

A leisurely meanderer it became, just like in my book. 

 

 

 

Healing Touch

Role of a physician: “Cure Sometimes, Treat Often, Comfort Always”- Hippocrates

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These days I often have a sinking feeling

Fogged in despair, my head is reeling

Did I somehow, gravely misunderstand

The role of a physician, that healing hand

Why do I encounter, more and more

Suffering each day, less and less cure?

Technical advancements let us prolong

Life without improving it- something is wrong-

I make them feel better- in the short-term I do

But they keep on suffering, as maladies accrue

I treat their illnesses, but cannot alleviate

Their suffering and pain, which continue to accumulate

For every new setback I can offer solutions-

More testing, procedures, expert consultations

I patch all the holes, while trying to deceive

Myself, trying my hardest to believe

Whatever I do would miraculously cure

All ills of my patient, old age and more

But this holistic ideal is a mere fantasy

There’s little I change, that I clearly see

My judgment as a physician is probably sound

Based on current practice, but it seems profound

To see how I have but little influence

On their quality of lives, I make not much difference..

**

This is the question I asked myself and God

Not helping people, I felt like a fraud

The answer came to me one day in my sleep

Brilliant in its simplicity, it was deep

Treating the ailment was where I paid attention-

Treating the patient would give me more satisfaction

So I changed my strategy, trying to comprehend 

The patient as much as his illness, to make amends

For all these years where my focus had been wrong

I wonder why I  practiced that way for so long

**

I am but an instrument in the hands of Almighty

I try my best to heal, that’s my role in society

But more than that, I try to remember I can

Provide comfort always, to every single man.

 

 

Rhythm and Chaos

DSC04620Rhythm and Chaos, free spirits two

On a whim decided to

Compete with each other just to see

Who between them could more swiftly

Traverse the breadth of the Galaxy

Each one set out determinedly

With aplomb and audacity

Confident in their capacity

To out-maneuver the other one

Journeying through the galaxy was much fun..

**

Now Rhythm had her course all charted out

She glided through the path without a doubt

Gracefully, steadily, each step predictable

In stride and cadence, precise and measurable

Through light-years of travel she followed a pattern

Weaving her way gracefully through every turn

Calm as the ocean at low tide she remained

Her emotions never wavered or changed.

**

While Chaos set out with just a general vision

Of her journey, no map to lead her to her destination

She stumbled through obstacles, crashed and collided

Transformed herself , new ideas to worlds she provided

Rode high on the tides of exhilaration; ebbed with the low

Influenced by surroundings, she went with the flow

Her emotions ran raw and high fairly often

It was a roller-coaster ride throughout, no path was even.

**

Rhythm reached her destination, the location precise

At the diametrically opposite point of the galaxy; she was wise

To plant a flag firmly in the nebula that explained

The exact co-ordinates of her end location, and proclaimed

The exact time in which her journey was completed

She did not see Chaos, she considered her defeated.

**

Meanwhile Chaos in her laissez-faire manner had reached

An undiscovered corner of the galaxy, its virginity not breached

She stood there admiring the beauty of this new place

She had almost forgotten about the frivolous race

**

God had been following with great interest

He was the self-appointed  judge of this contest

He found that both Rhythm and Chaos had taken

The same amount of time for completion, down to the second

The total distance traveled did not vary by even a fraction

Both had discovered different areas in opposite directions

But at diametrically opposite ends of the galaxy

Thus both achieved the same, as you see

So He announced the result of the competition

As a tie between the two, after due consideration

**

As an unhappy Rhythm tried to voice her concern

Over misunderstanding, quite out of turn

God turned to both and decided to explain

How each was right in her own domain.

“Without Rhythm, there would be no life anywhere

For who could live if Sun decided to disappear 

 

Life is designed around the absolute predictability

Of days, nights, seasons, reassuring in their immutability..

While Chaos is the restless curiosity that resides 

Within human beings, it flows with the tides

Always on the lookout for novel experiences

New ideas, new emotions to satiate the senses

Without Chaos, the world would not have progressed

Humans would be cavemen, in animal skins dressed

While Rhythm provides the backbone for progress

Chaos accomplishes new feats by virtue of restlessness

**

So they went their merry way, each contented

With her place in the universe, as was intended.

****

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

My sanctuary

DSC03311.JPGAs I observe my child engrossed

In playing with his toys, completely lost

In his own world, inventing stories

That he narrates to himself, without any worries

He is quite oblivious of his creativity

While I, proud as only a mother could be

Marvel at him, then travel back in time

To when such creative pursuits were mine

And say to myself, a tad wistfully

I wish I could channel my creativity..

Years spent in rigorous medical  training

Have obliterated the imaginative being

That once was me, bubbling with stories within

That longed to escape, into words woven

Ideas that evaporated, lost their existence

Because I had no time to give them substance..

And now I feel that well of creativity

Has dried up, exasperated by its futility

How I long to channel once again

The creative streak in my pragmatic brain..

**

This was me contemplating over a year ago

How to let the seed of creativity grow

Had to start somewhere, myself I told-

After weeks of deliberation, I became bold

Enough to put my voice out there

Thus started this blog, I finally did dare

To put my thoughts out in such a way

That would demand commitment day after day

To pen down my ideas for the blog’s existence

Having this blog fueled my persistence

Now this is my haven, my quiet sanctuary

To which I escape from my daily life dreary.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Healing touch of prayer

DSC05348.JPGWas taught about God when I was young

Many hymns in His praise I had sung

Was taught to fold my hands and pray

At the start and the end of my day

It was easy to whisper without comprehension

A prayer I was taught, but difficult to pay attention

Over the years I got conditioned to pray

 

For the Almighty to show me the way

Whenever I felt the pangs of fear

Whenever my loved ones were not near

Prayer was a means of distraction

Especially during times of fearful inaction

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I do not know when I got desensitized

To the effects of prayer, but somewhere I realized

I could not pray even in stressful situations

I could not close my eyes and exercise patience

 

As a physician when I met with illness and death

I became a skeptic, in prayer I lost all faith

**

 

Faced with a personal tragedy one day

In desperation I invoked God and tried to pray

It was not easy, I could not concentrate

At first, but I persisted, I was desperate

An inner calm finally descended on me

A silver lining to dark clouds I could see

**

For prayer is not for God but for mortals like me

To calm us, give confidence in times of misery

To loosen the strings that bind us to fear

From the web of emotions, prayer can our mind clear.

 

 

 

 

 

Plunder of the earth

DSC04066We are a species of intelligence superior

With the audacity to transform nature-

We take freely from the earth its treasures

And modify them aggressively for our pleasures.

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The fruits of the earth are not always perfect

We know it, but why should we this fact accept

The food we eat should epitomize perfection

For which we have created genetic modification

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So we get used to fruits bigger and juicier

They all look the same, not one is peculiar

Our breads are much softer and fluffier

Thanks to hybridization over the years..

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We have taken fossil fuels freely from earth

They are like liquid gold in their worth

Our carbon footprints have increased in size

And global warming is making the oceans rise…

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How can I not mention destructive nuclear power

Genetic mutations are caused by radioactive showers

The soil is poisoned for eons to come-

This is regarded as success by some..

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But every infringement exacts a price

The earth has been suffering, it’s not always nice

Thus unpredictable weather patterns we see

Hail from an earth disappointed in humanity

*

We need to remember we cannot bite

The hand that feeds us, or else it would fight

In retaliation- cataclysmic events might occur

We need to stop this mindless plunder!

 

 

 

 

 

 

Cee’s Fun Foto Challenge: White Flowers

Can’t remember the last time I participated in a challenge..I could not resist this challenge though. All photographs were taken at Longwood Gardens, PA.

Enjoy!

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orchid 10DSC05948

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Inertia

DSC06221.JPGWhy do I have inertia so profound

In going to bed for a sleep sound

Glued I am to my computer screen

Why doesn’t the bed inviting seem?

When I finally trudge to bed

I’ll be checking my phone instead

Of closing my eyes to try to sleep..

Why don’t I yearn for slumber deep?

Tossing and turning, finally I succumb

To deep sleep, my resistance finally overcome.

**

In the sanguine morning, once again

When it’s time to wake up, inertia reigns

Now I cannot my languid limbs force

Into a vertical posture; in due course

I fling myself out of bed when I see

My bedside alarm clock ticking away furiously

**

I fault this inertia which leads me

To procrastinate both ways endlessly

I fantasize about sleeping on time every night

And waking at the crack of dawn, ready for flight

If that happens even once, I will let you know

Goodbye for now, off to bed I must go!

 

 

 

 

 

Online Shopping

M_Id_449279_Shopping_dicountI often struggle to exercise self-restraint

Temptations are plenty, and I am no saint

When online retailers hold their surprise sales

E-mailing reminders, any attempt at restraint fails

Seventy percent off is too good to ignore

It’s a good time to update my wardrobe some more

Being good at arithmetic, I can calculate

Quite quickly the reduced price, and satiate

Myself with the victory of having scored a good deal

A savvy shopper and a fashionista- that’s how I feel

Ignoring that small admonishing voice within my head 

“This money could be used for necessary items instead”

Granted, gorgeous items were found at prices unbeatable

Buying them, though not essential, did seem reasonable

I wait for items to go on sale, so that I can buy

What I like; I hate paying full-price, I can’t deny

It is so simple to order stuff online

Just a few clicks, no need to even sign

Online shopping is a boon and a curse

It has certainly loosened the strings of my purse!

Image source:dietkart.blogspot.com

 

 

 

Reinvention

 

DSC05591Reinventing yourself is often talked about,

It is the mantra in vogue, without a doubt

Open your mind and your purse, get a makeover

Live the life that you’ve dreamt of, before it is over

That is what “lifestyle consultants” proclaim

You could be a new person behind the old name..

Unfortunately the methods of reinvention

Seem to be archaic and prone to repetition

Weight loss, change of clothing and hair style

While these help you go forward an extra mile

May make you more outgoing and confident

But getting a new skin does not reinvent

The person that is truly, sincerely you-

Reinventing yourself completely implies

Changing yourself more deeply than you may realize

Challenging and changing your beliefs deep-seated

Radically, completely, or your purpose is defeated

It takes courage to perform an honest assessment

Of your own shortcomings, without resentment

It takes willpower to change your beliefs and actions

While consciously ignoring others’ reactions..

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Reinvention is for yourself, not for an audience

It cannot be done under any false pretense

 

It involves introspection, a difficult journey

Full of surprises, on the road to self-discovery..

So reinvent yourself, by all means do

Emerge from the process happier too!

 

 

 

 

New Year

DSC06161 - CopyAnother year has dawned, it’s the first of January

Eager I am to fill the pages of my diary

It’s a good idea to start on the very first day

My mind draws a blank, there’s nothing new to say

Nothing that sounds original, groundbreaking

Probably a rehash of resolutions I’ve been making

Year after year, to celebrate the first day

Most are forgotten in a week, seldom some stay

Like everyone else, I make changes when motivated

By circumstances, changing yourself on this day is overrated

If everyone could by their new year resolutions abide

The beginning of each year would turn the tide

Every new year, positive changes would be found

Wishful thinking, I know, though the logic is sound.

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Before I sign-off, here’s a warm wish for you

Happy new year, and a lifetime of happiness too!